THE NAKED COWBOY HOLDS A NAKED PRESS CONFERENCE WHERE HE TELLS AMERICA THAT HE MEANS NAKED BUSINESS

He's trading his bikini briefs for legal ones. The Naked Cowboy filed a lawsuit Wednesday against the Naked Cowgirl, claiming she stole his idea and is sullying his name. The tighty-whitey wearing Times Square stalwart, whose real name is Robert Burck, claims his female competitor muscled in on his turf in 2008 and is "devaluing a real American brand and Icon." "No one else should be profiting off the Naked Cowboy brand," said Burck's lawyer, Joe Jackson. "This woman is confusing tourists and destroying the brand." Burck filed the trademark infringement suit against the cowgirl, whose real name is Sandra Brodsky, in Manhattan federal court. Burck said his idea - which he trademarked in 2000 - is about clean, wholesome fun. He claims the cowgirl is tarnishing the name with her antics. "She has been observed using visual profanity (flipping the bird at the camera) when photographing with people in Times Square," the lawsuit states. "This is inconsistent with the manner in which the Naked Cowboy conducts business."

The Naked Cowboy is dropping the Naked Hammer on this Naked Cowgirl Bitch of an Impostor. This is Naked Bullshit! Naked Cowboy is about "clean, wholesome fun" where you aim your 'pointer' at everyone passing by. It's not about some girl shaking her boobie tassles at everyone. This is the *new* Times Square, not the 1970's Times Square. Wait, wait...Naked Cowboy already lets one woman call herself the Naked Cowgirl? what does she look like?.... So he let's her strut around next to him in NYC but not the OTHER Naked Cowgirl? What does she look like?... - - - - - - - - Hmmm, there is some kind of subtle difference between the two women but I can't quite put my finger on it...does one not have teeth? Anyway, here's the Naked Cowboy in action. The guy is pure balls. No pun intended.

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I personally LOVE how the Naked Cowboy carries himself. Just listen to the lines he drops its fucken hilarious. First he just completely disregards anything the woman said in her introduction and just breaks into a quick little cowboy jam. Then the women stare at his junk and he's like, what do I eat for breakfast? Intensity! Modesty? There's not room in my underwear to carry any modesty. Huh? I got a question for Fitness magazine, What took ya so long? (FLEX) After breakfast I go to the gym and do reps of one exercise until everyone is staring at me. I need to wear two pairs of underwear...for my protection, and yours. (FLEX)