(i was trying to find an image to go with this post, but got sidetracked on the internet superhighway and found this vintage drunken midgets footage. so i'm just gonna use it instead of something relevant) (Yahoo.com) Maybe the odds of winning the lottery would be a lot better if Joan Ginther would stop buying all the good tickets. By now you may have heard of the Las Vegas resident, who you probably want sitting next to you when an asteroid, slungshot by aliens, is aimed at your plane. She recently cashed in a winning $10 million scratch-off ticket, making the lucky woman a four-time lottery winner. That's right, four times. And while she now lives in Sin City thereabouts, the multi-millionaire prefers her to buy her tickets in her home state of Texas. The state, like many others, is on track to having one of its best lottery years ever during tough economic times...and that might be a bad thing. But, more on that later. First, a look at Ginther's lottery loot so far, and the odds: •1993: $5.4 million (paid in yearly installments). Odds: 1 in 15.8 million •2006: $2 million (lump-sum payoff). Odds: 1 in 1,028,338. •2008: $3 million (lump-sum payoff). Odds: 1 in 909,000. •2010: $10 million (lump-sum payoff). Odds: 1 in 1,200,000. Does this make Joan a professional degenerate? Is it possible to be this good at throwing your money away? She must have used her initial winnings to implant a huge set of balls because you gotta be crazy to play the lotto nowadays. Because in times when the economy is shite, the state chokes the flow of winning lottery tickets down to a slow drip. Has anyone played Keno lately? Impossible to win. last time I filled my card out and handed it in the bartender just gave me a ticket that said "Sorry, Not A Winner!" back But one thing I do love about this story is Joan's panache. Those balls. You know that conversation people always have about "What I'd do with my money?" And some people say Buy a house and invest. Others say they'd make college funds. Some say they'd take a drug fueled jetliner on a non-stop global trip where they'd never touch down to land again and just keep refilling mid-air. (someone actually said that) But then you got that asshole, kind of like a iSmug reporter and right after YOU say how you'd selfishly spend your lottery winnings on a creating a one-of-a-kind bald-eagle-feathered-snuggy someone chimes in with "I'd give mine to charity" . sonofabitch. BUT NOT JOAN! She's like, How much did I win? 5.4 mill? Hmmm, Let it ride... Then she just keeps buying tickets, and even if she spent all of her initial 5.4 million, it was worth it because now she's worth 3x that much. Fuck the odds! and fuck everyone else too. It's Joan's money, and she wants it now. In his novel 1984 George Orwell wrote: "Heavy physical work, the care of home and children, petty quarrels with neighbors, films, football, beer, and, above all, gambling filled up the horizon of their minds. To keep them in control was not difficult." If he had included "blogs" then he'd have hit the nail on the head.
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