ok so I know I've barely been posting lately but that's because I came back from CA to find my internet is down and typing lengthy posts on my Droid sucks (sorry in advance; like when i play golf), but I have to hit this.story because I've once again predicted the future! (twice actually if you include when this prediction comes to fruition) and I can't bear the disappointment of not voicing it yet again. First let me remind everyone of my latest two.correct predictions. first was when Tiger Woods got smashed up by Elin. As soon as I read the initial blurb that said Elin used a golf club to "help" Tiger escape from the "burning wreckage" of his 8 MPH in-reverse car crash. I have witnesses who will vouch for me that I said it was domestic abuse. now I won't claim that I knew about all the white-chick-banging that was happening, I'm not a magician I can just sniff out a story like no other brother can. the other news story I plucked the truth out of was when the My Prius Tried To Kill Me saga exploded. B-fucken-S. Know how I knew those people were all lying and trying to sue? Because I would have tried the same exact scam. I actually did but I was on my 12-speed bicycle so no one bought it...hand brakes count... ok so here it is: My prediction,;my guarantee ;My Promise is that the "stolen item" J-Woww is talking about is a sex tape. what else would it be? A dispute over their Lost: Season 1&2 DVD box-set? This bitch makes 10,000 USDs an episode. 10k for a half hour of letting the world see how worthless you are. She can afford any sort of item you'd leave behind...except the tangibles. the sentimentals...the-- scandalous. her ex, this kid Lippolis, is gonna sell this tape for a pretty penny. (BANG! now that's investigatory journalism Miss Magee! ill wave to you from the top.) and so remember this, or don't bother because ill remind you anyway. Anybody wanna have a competition to try and think up the best name for the sex tape? My first entry is "Thank God It's Not Snooki In A Sex Tape"
why do I predict (hope) it's a sex tape....
....That's fucken why. Just look at that nice, round, sexy, Ferris Wheel... I can't wait to make jwoww's clambake my screensaver.
1. You're going to have to show me how to blog on the droid.
ReplyDelete2. I agree with you 100% it's the porn tape. "PLOWIN' HOWLIN' J'WOWWIN" would by my guess.
3. Jersey Shore has taken over my life. Best show on TV.